Lice

I have them. Saravia found them. Norma gave me shampoo to kill them. One of the tias in the baby house picked them out. And I have so much pena.

Being Home

A list of things I love:

1)Quality time with my amazing friends and family.

2)Cuddling with my kitties.

3)Flushing my toilet paper.

4)Hot showers.

5)Flavors.

6)Spending the day at Zeiger and feeling absolutely adored by children. It also helped to be told by staff and parents how great I look (healthy reminder of the heartbroken pit of despair I was in before I left and how much the Ranch has healed me).

7)Dates with Grandma: Seattle Art Museum, Seattle Opera, and Bookers.

8)The fact that Sister moved home the same time as my visit.

9)Seeing the new Harry Potter with Mich and sharing an epic crepe.

10)Visiting my old Spanish class and having the other guest speaker (the firefighter from Spain) insist that I must have some Latin in me because my Spanish is just that good.

AND...Spreading the word about NPH. Whether it is getting a huge suitcase full of donations from the Zeiger Girl Scout troop or friends donating everything from flat irons to nail polish for the girls or facilitating new sponsorships. I love sharing about this organization that is so close to my heart, and I love that people in my life have taken an interest in it.

A list of things I don't love:

I freaking MISS the Ranch. I miss speaking Spanish. I miss the volunteers. I miss my babies. And I miss my girls. Ready to go home. You know, the other one.

Brigade

Three or four times a year, a medical brigade comes to the Ranch to do orthopedic surgeries for kids here as well as people in the surrounding community. The surgery center was built by the Daly family, and they bring a huge group down every year. The work they do is amazing, but managing 60 extra people is definitely a major undertaking. Well, our volunteer visitor coordinator (my friend and roommate Marie) had to leave the Ranch, and since I worked for her during her vacation and was planning on helping with the brigade, it fell to me. On the 2nd, I came off 12 straight days of work in hogar (the last four of which I slept there) to start prepping for the brigade to get here the 5th. Fortunately, I’d already done a general schedule as well as one for meals and hogar assignments. So my work involved getting rooms ready, arranging for materials to be purchased, moving furniture, cleaning (working with the tías to get girls to help), managing last minute visitors (including putting one in the vacant bed in my own room), answering my phone every 5 minutes, and generally running around and putting out fires. Fortunately, I hac Reinhart’s daughter to Camila to help (she’s a godsend), and Ross gave me saldo and cash without even blinking.

I had to go to the airport FOUR times, which is a 3-hour round trip on the worst, dustiest, potholiest highway on Planet Earth. Going to the airport means confirming transport, picking up visitors, tipping the baggage guys, getting everyone something to eat, doing a mini-orientation, running errands, and getting everyone settled in their rooms. While they’re here, I’m the go-to girl. I make sure they know where to go and when, answer questions about the Ranch, make sure they have water and get fed, etc. It’s A LOT of work, but the group is really great. I'm especially enjoying the girls who are students and are staying in the volunteer house. They are planning my marriage to someone who shall remain unnamed.

The best part has been that through the experience, Reinhart and Momo have become my adopted parents. They invite me to eat, Momo fixes me up with her naturopathic remedies when I’m sick, and Reinhart now calls me his conse. I’ve been such a stress case, but the volunteers have been so awesome. Whether it’s Lauren getting me keys copied and hanging up my laundry or Trip handling last minute maintenance issues or Jessie taking care of the water or Pete and Bryan picking things up for me in the city or Leila making sure I use positive self-talk, I don’t know what I’d do without them.

I managed to go to mass five times in four days. I’m not Catholic, but I go regularly here, and I really enjoy the priest that came with the group. He was born in Nigeria and now lives in Chicago and speaks a bajillion languages. I even went up to do one of the readings. I also get to have seriously legit Italian dinners every night they’re here, so that’s awesome. Another bonus of having so many doctors here: being able to grab one and get antibiotics for my swollen ankle due to infected bugbites (just what I needed).

The worst part was finding out Sunday night after another 14 hour day that I had to move all my stuff out of my room so they can start doing construction before I left (Tuesday morning). I got so stressed out that I had a half-hour nose bleed. I was literally leaning over my sink bleeding and bawling. Again, volunteers to the rescue. Real friends become your personal RN and bleach out your bloody sink (Tiffany). Real friends mop up your blood off the floor and help pack your bags (Patri and Sona). Real friends hold you even when you're disgusting, make you go to bed, and promise to pack everything you don't need for home (Pete).

In the end, everything went well. Lulu said this was the most organized they'd ever been, Ross told me I was a rockstar every day, and Stefan told me repeatedly they'd be dead without me. Jessie is taking the job over on a more permanent basis, so when I get home, I'll get some much needed downtime.

Rosa Lilian

Rosa was an energetic, loving 16 year-old girl who most impressed me with how she cared for her 5 siblings here at the Ranch. She was in Inmaculada, the hogar just below mine. She was on my Olimipiadas team two years in a row and part of the soccer team that went to El Salvador. Her family came here during my first visit, and I had a special bond with her because she was also the beloved goddaughter of my dear friend Laura. She always had a smile and a hug for me. We lost Rosa on New Year’s Eve due to a tragic accident at the house in Tegucigalpa.

I knew something was wrong the second I saw Lauren’s face in my doorway. It was 6:00 p.m., and we had all just been called to the church. I made her tell me before we went, but I didn’t process it until Reinhart announced it. I just started crying, sitting next to Estefany and holding hands. We had dinner all together on the courts, but all activities were obviously cancelled. I went immediately to Saravia, knowing she was a stronger person than me, as much for comfort as to make sure she knew how much I loved her, realizing all too vividly how quickly a life can be taken away. She took care of me all night and it struck me how well she knows me. Reinhart gave me the hug only a dad or grandpa can give, made the sign of the cross on my forehead, and gave me permission to cry and not be strong. As always, the volunteers were a source of comfort and strength.

Rosa’s brothers and sisters were all together in Santa María Reina. I went to see my little Gabi, “mi hija” and the youngest, who still didn’t understand what had happened. The oldest, Eda, has cerebral palsy and is unable to really walk or talk. I can’t express what it was like to hear to her utter despair as she cried. I found Deysi inconsolable back at the hogar. She had just come from seeing Bryan at the clinic. Bryan is my godson and, although not officially her boyfriend, in love with Rosa. He was shaking uncontrollably and asking for Deysi to call Rosa and tell her to come. We had to physically restrain him to keep him in the bed. It was horrible. I ended up alone with him in the room and held him in my arms as he sobbed and begged to see her until I coaxed him to sleep. I think the worst, though, was having to call Laura and tell her. I love Laura with all my heart, and it broke me to have to give her the news.

Following dinner, we had rosaries in the chapel every half hour. I sat with my arms around my girls as we prayed for Rosa. They brought her body back to the Ranch at 1:00 in the morning, and a small group of us headed back to the chapel. I can’t begin to describe the grief I saw from her siblings, friends, Stefan, and Tía Mirna who brought Rosa’s family to the Ranch. And I was not prepared to see Rosa. It just wasn’t her underneath that glass, and I had to look a long time to really register that it was her. I’ve never dealt with death like this, and I feel numb. My tears are used up, and I’m left feeling like maybe it was all a bad dream.

Christmastime is Here

Here in Honduras, Nochebuena (Christmas Eve) is a bigger deal than Christmas Day, so I was quite busy on the 24th. After breakfast and chores, we all headed down to the courts for games. I helped out with a game called El Dulce that is so classic Ranch it’s ridiculous. Here’s how it works. First, you go to the kitchen and get several blocks of this brown sugary substance. Then, you put it in the middle of a sack in a space marked out in a field. You then take a child, blindfold him, and hand him a MACHETE. (I wish I was joking). Whatever part of the giant sugar cube he hacks off is his to eat. No, seriously. In the late afternoon, I got to talk on the phone to several of my precious girls on their internship in the city. Then I got pretty because Deysi told me on the phone that I had to andar guapa. So I decided to go Honduran or go home and wear the dress I bought at the secondhand store three of my girls worked at. It was definitely a big hit on the Ranch, although Quinn might punch me if I wear it at home. In the evening we had the pastorela, which was a video of the kids acting out the Christmas story. We then all headed down for dinner in Buen Pastor. We had nacatamales, empanadas, and fruit that we hardly ever get (apples and grapes). They put on a movie for the kids, but I mostly hung out with my mara by the bonfire. The best part was having little Natalia (new to the Ranch, completely adorable, and desperate for affection) fell asleep on my lap. That night was kind of like New Year’s in that you stay up until midnight and then everyone gives hugs and says, “Feliz Navidad.” It felt really good to get hugs from so many people…sort of a physical manifestation of the relationships I’ve made with pequeños and grandes here. We headed back to hogar around 1:00 a.m., and I had signed up to do turno (spend the night in hogar). It was basically a big sleepover, and we ended up watching movies on my laptop until 6:30 in the morning. Totally ridiculous and really fun. By the time I actually got to my bed, one of the girls was already asleep in it!!

Christmas Day was good too. We finally dragged our sorry butts out of bed at 10:00. I had played Santa and put their presents on the girls’ beds next to their sweet little sleeping (most of them) heads. The girls were so grateful for the bolsitas I’d put together for them, and many of them were using their soaps and lip glosses, wearing their earrings, and eating their treats that day. They were really excited about the mirrors I bought for the two bedrooms – definitely a good choice. Even though we got up so late, there was still food by some miracle, and we were able to have breakfast. Afterwards, I headed down to the Buen Pastor to deliver gifts to my monton of ahijados (a chess set for Axel and framed pictures for the others). I was able to get a quick nap in before I went back to hogar. Momo and Reinhart invited me to lunch at their house, and we had a really nice time. I feel like they’ve kind of adopted me. In the evening, we lined up outside Casa Suyapa for a candlelit procession into the church. It was decorated beautifully, and mass was really nice. Natalia fell asleep on my lap AGAIN, but mass involves lots of sitting down and standing up and I was in heels, so that was more of a challenge. Each hogar was assigned a part of a poem to read or, más bien, memorize. I had two of my girls say they would do it and then back out, so as mass began, the little slip of paper was passed to me. I spent most of the first part of mass memorizing the poem with Natalia on my lap. But it went fine. I loved the music and was tickled to recognize a song I’d learned for Christmas in flamenco classes. I went back to hogar for dinner and then bowed out as soon it was reasonable to pass completely out in my own bed.

I really miss my family and friends and was so glad to get to talk to some of them on Christmas Day, but I’m not as sad as I thought I might be. As I said to my girls at breakfast on Christmas, being my first one away from home, I was so glad to get to spend it with them. Here, there is no shortage of love and affection, and I am so grateful for this experience.

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas

Or at least feel like it. It's been really strange to sit under the sun and realize Christmas is in two days. But then I look around and see the Christmas trees, swags, nativity scenes, and lights, and I remember. The tíos really did an incredible job decorating. Tuesday was my last day off, and it was lovely. I watched Beauty and the Beast while I wrapped presents and put together bolsitas (little baggies with treats and small gifts - sort of like stockings) for the Pilares. My consentida came over around 11:00 to hang out. I made her french toast, and we played with her friend's puppy Clifford. In the evening, we had the Christmas dinner for Talita Kumi (all the girls). All the tías and volunteers wore red and put on Santa hats. Mine lit up, and I got a ton of attention for it. We all know how much I hate that. Dinner was so good. We had pork marinated in some kind of sauce with dried cherries, scalloped potatoes (!!!), salad, and flan. There was a bonfire, music, and I showed a PowerPoint I made of photos I took of the girls in El Salvador. When I got home and sat at the picnic table, my friend Juan Luis (who is a university student that I met on my trip last year and I haven't seen in months) popped by. He was quite taken aback by how much my Spanish had improved and gave me the best compliment ever - that I'm now speaking like a Honduran! These last few days, I've begun my role as tía. It's really easy in Pilares because they get themselves up, do their chores without much reminding, and head off to work while I hold the fort in the hogar. Pretty easy so far. Tonight is the volunteer Christmas dinner. Tomorrow will be a busy day - Christmas Eve is a bigger deal than Christmas Day. Estefany offered to give me Christmas Day off since she's leaving me alone and in charge when she goes to visit family the 26th-30th. I thought I might be lonely, but Tía Momo invited me to Christmas dinner at her house. So I'll be just fine. And I just might be filled with the Christmas spirit.

Vacation in Amapala

According to Lonely Planet: "Amapala is a quiet fishing village on Isla del Tigre, a 783m-high inactive volcano island. Founded in 1833, Amapala was once Honduras' main Pacific port town, before the port was moved to San Lorenzo on the mainland."

Here's how my vacation started: Leila and I left for Tegus early Friday afternoon to do some Christmas shopping. It was absolute madness there. We picked up a cake for Max's birthday and met up with the other volunteers to share it. At the bar we were at, we met several expatriates who knew Amapala well and offered to help us out. Later, at we headed to the Honduran equivalent of a farmers' market, where I ordered a torta (the Honduran equivalent of a sloppy Joe). We followed that up with a night of dancing at Mister Marino, where we encountered the entire Ranch (exaggerating a little bit, but still awkward).

In the morning, we met up with the expats in Parque Central. They guided us to the shadiest bus station ever in Comayaguela (the most dangerous neighborhood in Tegucigalpa, the most dangerous city in all of Central America). I was definitely freaked out when I was warned by one of my Pilares who is working in the market on empleo and who I ran into, my Honduran friend Chele who was to accompany us, and some random lady, that it was really risky for us to be there. Eek. I felt much better when Chele arrived and we were all safely on the bus. After four hours, we finally arrived at Coyolito. From there, we took a fishing boat to the island. The daughter of one of the guys we met was going to meet us and help us with a place to stay, but she was far away from the beach, so we went with Chele's suggestion that we stay with a woman who had always offered him a room. After walking for what seemed like forever, I started to think negatively. As in, what if there is no food and shelter because this is not the United States and I just sit down and die? Sometimes I'm a bit dramatic. Well, I shouldn't have doubted Chele because at the end of Playa Grande was a small hotel with its own restaurant run by the incomparable Doña Digna. It was literally right on the beach, and as soon as we girls got our stuff in the room (the boys opted to camp on the beach), WE SWAM IN THE PACIFIC OCEAN. As a native Washingtonian, this was just so counterintuitive for me. We finished up the night with fried fish caught fresh that day.

We woke up to the boys playing soccer on the beach with the locals. After a lovely breakfast, we set out to...relax on the beach. We drank out of a coconut and I got a ridiclously awesome tan. Digna's son Javier offered to show us Playa del Diablo. We went on a little hike, and from there the bad decisions began. To get to Playa Diablo, you have to jump off of a tree on a cliff into water of questionable depth. Which I did. After another short hike, the group decided to swim across the bay to an island. I've always been warned against swimming unknown distances because it's always longer than it looks. I am an extremely poor swimmer (not so much with the floating), but Pete and Tiffany offered to be my personal water wings, so I went ahead and did it. I'm pretty impressed with myself and how I'm pushing myself physically this year. I don't think I'll be afraid of anything after this. We headed back to Playa Grande and decided epic three-way chicken fights were in order. Jason and I reigned supreme, due to his brute strength and my willingness to play dirty combined with an insatiable desire to win. We headed into town that night and found a little restaurant on the water. Patricia and I shared a plate of ceviche (raw something-or-other that lives in the ocean) and camarones al ajillo (shrimp in garlic sauce). The shrimp was by far the best food I've had in Honduras.

We left Amapala early this morning. The girls rode in a motor taxi as much for the experience as the desire to never walk again. The bus ride was much more unpleasant this time, as most of the group had to stand the whole time. A nice gentleman eventually offered me his seat. When we got into Tegus, I finished up my Christmas shopping and went and visited three of my girls in the store they work at in the center. I hung back when the rest of the group headed up to Cerro Grande so I could have coffee with another girl, but she wasn't able to get off work. Walking around with so much stuff always freaks me out. I'm convinced I'm going to get robbed. It's not entirely unfounded since it recently happened to two of our volunteers. I was relieved to get up to the Cerro and find the rest of the volunteers, Momo and her daughter Camila, and several others from the Ranch. But that also meant that they hadn't gotten on a bus yet. EVERYONE was in Tegus today, and the buses were so full people were hanging out the doors. Fortunately, a friend of Momo's passed by in a relatively empty van and took us all the way to our doorsteps on the Ranch. What luck!

Now I'm here and getting settled in for the long haul that is Christmas. Christmas dinner is tomorrow night, and the tíos and tías leave the next day. Each hogar is assigned a university or high school student or two to be in charge (volunteers are there as a support). But not mine. It's just me and one of my girls, Estefany. I'm looking at 11 days as Tía Kimmie. Wish me luck.